yay

OH YES. Finally, this is OVER.
Was so glad i am able to make it.

Say hi to the working world again.

I realised i have so many things to do, yet i don't know where and how to start.
PLAN PLAN PLAN. 
I need a plan.
Give me.

what about it?

With great power, comes great responsibilities. And the higher salary you want, the greater responsibilities you have, in short more shit and more stress.

i fear for interviews. take it easy, people say. and you know its impossible. How do you even take it easy when it is the most crucial part for a job selection?

Just saw a case study example of Boston consulting Group. i didn't expect the interview questions to be something like that?? Requires you to really think hard and provide recommendations. And you are supposed to make use of your knowledge learn in school! What competitors, what threat of entrants those kind of thing. I do not like this at all. i had enough of school already so don't ask me to apply it in real life!! i hate to think of what write for essays already still ask me think for this! WHY DO DIS. But i should have guessed, a consulting firm which provide recommendations for clients to improve their businesses. And let me guess, i would have to answer well in order to get in there?

What are my aspirations?
Up till now, i don't even know. People tell me after you studied for a degree, you know what you are going to do next. But no, i still don't fking know. Just follow, that's what everyone does, with no goals and aspirations, you can only follow and hoping 'oh that what i liked?'

i guess i would probably be going into financial sector since its the top 10 for fresh graduates.

What to do? With no goals and aspirations, that's what you do.
and whatever it is, i blamed it on the society for making us this way. If money wasn't an important thing, why would we even need to care about getting high salaries and doing shit job? i would be more than happy to staying at home and rot.


Inspire me

Oh yes!!!
Finally I am done with my finals! I have never felt so much alive before!! Don't know why but it seems like I've reached the pinnacle of my life.

ITS LIKE I AM FINALLY DONE WITH STUDIES. ok that is if I managed to graduate..
I really want to enjoy my holidays before I start working. After all, once you start working, you can't stop. there is only working and working. The weekdays seems long and the weekends seems short. Its a never ending cycle. Yes, money is there for motivation but you know that's not you really want..

Recently I watched an inspirational talk by Nick Vijicic on channel 5. I found it really inspiring. A guy without limbs was able to do so much things, accomplished so much in life. HE CAN SWIMS. I am so impressed. How is that even possible? The problem here is I am lacking of courage. Sometimes we just wont step up the big step and see what it takes us. One thing is about swimming, I still haven't muster the courage to swim even a lap, although I got the basics somehow right. I feel that I wont be able to make it to the end and therefore here I am, still stuck in between. I should be like him, keep trying and trying till I succeed. After all, what is failure? Is just a obstacle to prevent us from going us further. And I am just going to embrace it LIKE a boss.


“If I fail, I try again, and again, and again. If YOU fail, are you going to try again? The human spirit can handle much worse than we realize. It matters HOW you are going to FINISH. Are you going to finish strong?”
Nick Vujicic


Don't. Whine.

It's getting on my nerves. I don't know why all those working adults are like these seriously. Because Scoots have given a 2 cent discount last week, people expect them to offer this again? And when they don't offer this cheap deal again, make so much noise? 


Come on lah, scoots is also an airline right. If every Tuesday keep offers 2 cent deal, then what they pay to the employees? Grass is it? 

Scoots marketing team must have regretted the decision for giving that damn cheap deal last week. 

Ok know what? i seriously can't stand WORKING ADULTS whining like a small kid. The comments section are full of kiddos. Please, is not like you can't afford right? You are already saving alot by taking budget airlines, what are those deals for you?? Ok even if it is, please don't whine like a child can anot??? Keep it to yourself or just stfu. It just shows how childish you are. Even my maturity level as a young adult is more superior than you. Shame, what a shame..


SIMPLE

This picture describes life pretty well.
I think i am currently in the young stage. Have time and energy but no money. How pathetic. When i read about articles about how people is already making money at the age of 18 by investing stocks, i wondered what i was doing at that time. 

Why wasn't matured enough to learn about making money? I envied those people who started earlier and when  time came, they can travel around anywhere whenever they feel like it. Not needing to think about how much to spend on trips.

I am currently 23 years old, studying for a bachelor degree in Business Management. Ya so?? What i have achieved so far compared to them is nothing. Those kids are already making so much money than i ever make when i was working that time. Good gracious! Why isn't there someone enlighten me at that time?? Maybe i would have become a millionaire. Ha.

Anyway, same sentiments as what yuzhen quoted "I feel like leaving this place, travel and see the world, not to worry about anything else, as simple as that.."

Delete the worries and have fun.

p/s: why wasn't I filthy rich? Then i won't be ranting here dajskdasnfkjadnfad.


“Man surprised me most about humanity.Because he sacrifices his health in order to make money.Then he sacrifices money to recuperate his health.And then he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present; the result being that he does not live in the present or the future; he lives as if he is never going to die, and then dies having never really live" -Quote from Dalai Lama XIV 

Disguise

Disguise as a commoner one day, only then you can understand the plights of the people.

I am very displeased with the train systems every single morning. Trains arriving at stations are always so packed, finds myself barely making through it and the waiting time intervals are like 5-8 minutes.Are there not enough trains? Early morning free train rides are not helping at all. In fact, i feel that more people are squeezing with me, i don't know why. I am getting frustrated every single day.

I can understand why people still squeeze in when there is only little space for them to stand. Who likes to squeeze in trains full of people? Nobody. If given a choice, if there are no concerns about work, i would gladly wait for another train or even sit on the seats and wait for the crowds to leave before i queue again. But the problem is cos WE GOT THE GOD DAMN WORK TO REPORT. How can we be late for work because of overcrowded trains? No, its not even a valid reason to begin with.  How is it ok for me to miss trains just because there are alot of people when i already timed perfectly to leave my house for work? Doesn't make sense. So to report on time, i have to accommodate all the people who are taking trains with me by leaving way earlier? Hello??

Something needs to be done to curb this overcrowding situation.

Mother Nature.

Dengue, haze and there is now some virus called the MERS passing around in Middle East. It's pretty scary to think about what Mother Nature did to us.

Today I watched World War Z and its about humans getting infected by zombies. A zombie apocalypse. What if one day there is this Z virus passing around and infecting people all over the world?

Mother Nature is a serial killer. We cannot stop these things from happening. Those viruses that arise from somewhere. People get infected, people die. Who are we to stop? What can we do?Prevention. That's about it. There is no cure for any new viruses. Vaccines? Yes there is, only after a long long time, ya perhaps we are not in the world anymore. No matter how advanced is the medical technology, it still needs to take a long time for a vaccine to develop.

Sometimes i find it hard to believe, a virus can just simply cause the deaths of many people.  

'virus is a small infectious agent that can replicate only inside the living cells of an organism.' (taken from wikipedia)

It is just a SMALL infectious agent that appears nowhere and can cause so much distress to us?? Dafuq is this? Why can this THING come out from nowhere and cause so much distress to us??? Damn annoying. Because of this, we have to protect ourselves. Making our lives difficult and in such a mess. We are so vulnerable. Once these viruses hits us, what can we do? We can only rely on our body's immune system. If it fails us, that's the end.Sometimes i am thinking whether i should be afraid of dying. If one is so negative about dying, what good can it do us? When it hits you, what can you do?

Sigh, come let's eat, pray, love. 

“Most people don't believe something can happen until it already has. That's not stupidity or weakness, that's just human nature.” 
― Max BrooksWorld War Z: An Oral History of the Zombie War

True that.

There you go, my birthday boy


4th June 2013
Happy birthday, dear! This is one of those occasions where I will rack my brains hard to come out with a good plan. It was never easy planning for the perfect day for you. As you know, we went almost everywhere in Singapore. Thinking of things to do was hard, moreover, the restaurants we never tried before. It's like impossibru! But still, i find pleasure planning the day for you, always determined to find nice restaurants for you to try out and places to go. Afterall,  planning for someone(that's you!) you love and seeing that person happy is all that matters anyway. :) 


This year was a very fruitful year for you, don't you think so? Durian cakes, durian cakes everywhere!! Haha. This year was also the year where I am stressed for your birthday. So many plans by so many people. Whyyyyy. But thank god, all went pretty well!

Planned for adventure cove to have some fun! But so just so happened it is June holidays. A less than 15 secs ride took almost 45 mins to sit. How ridiculously long for this. Time was so hard to pass with no devices on hand and noisy kids everywhere.

Snorkeling, I failed terribly. Became worse since the last time I snorkeled. Tell me what's the use of learning swimming for the past weeks. Initially thought I would be less afraid to swim around since I can swim fairly well now. I envy those people who can swim or dive. They make it seemed so easy. Give me one day. The fear of not being able to see underwater is really scary. All the things i saw are blurry. How to even see the different types of fishes. You can't. And the thing i only saw was how deep the aquarium is. I think I might have killed some corals while stepping it and hurting myself. 

Anyway, after this we went to watch Jurassic park 3D! Planned this as well cos you told me you loved dinosaurs since young and have all the book collections. And so i thought, this was just perfect for you! It wasn't disappointing to watch it all over again. Rather, its refreshing to watch this in 3D! Agree dear? :)  And finally you changed your opinion towards 3D. We then had dinner at serenity and desserts of cinnamon rolls with chocolate and strawberry mix at max brenner.



Say hi to the ridiculously photogenic dog

If everyday can be..

Oh today was a good day! I have more things to do, kept me occupied all the way till work ended! Time passed so surprisingly fast! Didn't have the chance dwell upon those yesterday negative thoughts. They began to talk to me more and eat lunch with me. ;) I think I can survive these few weeks already! Things are looking positive!! ;) This is not bad afterall! I actually dreaded coming to work today. 

Dislike

I got cheated by a company name. I thought it was a large company by the sound of it, but it turns out that  its not even a SME. I am so depressed having to face with only 3 people in the workplace, with age gap around 30-40 years of age. In addition, the workplace environment kinda sucks. Small space, small workdesk, slow laptop, old table, old chairs. How to survive! Kill me please

Maybe I got too used in a big company before and this is the first time I ever got into a very small company. Even my previous temp jobs, still got around 8-15 people lah!!.Thinking about it feels so pathetic. Give me a few more days to see if I can adapt. If not , bye!!! I cannot take it with this environment. I am not happy. Feels so suffocating. I don't mind the work but I mind the environment. Now I know why  working in SME sucks. The environment can kill you. 

Futureme

I received a email from futureme.org recently. It was written by me and it is to be sent at a date which i chose to receive it. And yes i was bored to try out this, pretty cool.
  • A letter from June 9th, 2012,

Dear FutureMe,
i already tendered my resignation on the 8th of june. serving one month notice - 7 july 2012. am going to SIM to study bachelor of business(management). i hope i can make it!
it is with regrets to leave my first company Mitsui & Co(asia pacific) pte.ltd.
i learnt alot form there.
met nice colleagues and bosses. namely alyssa, szemay, vanesssa, gladys, sok leng, suet ying etc. plus raymond and erma(good bosses)
yeah now as i look back.
i am now coping with my studies. cant wait to end school!!
definitely miss those days. :)
Ahh.. that day when i written it was the day after i tendered my resignation. Such memories.

Stay away from me

Thursday.
I was feeling exhausted due to lack of sleep the previous night. Despite this, I told myself I can take the long path again to city hall.  Cos the previous day when I took from Promenade to paya lebar, still have to walk and so I thought would be the same. And partly I wanted to shop around, but realised I was too tired to even see clothes. :( 

Never did I know walking to Cityhalll mrt that day was the worst day ever in my life!!!!!! EVER. 

Reached Mrt, at last the long walk is over. ithought there will not be much people. Instead, there are LONG queues to take mrt and intervals is 5 mins..which that means I have to wait for many trains and to add, I have to stand ALL THE WAY. At one point, I don't even know whether I can reach home anot. How sad .
So I decided to take to marina bay and switch to paya lebar. And it passed by Promenade which is like 5 mins walk to my office only. Kns. So I have been walking that long path for?!!! Feel like a fool seriously. Especially when you are so tired already and still have to face this shit! I was so pissed and angry and at that point, I really feel like spewing the vulgarities!! Argh.

The path to Suntec city really sucks to the core. Especially now with construction , here can't walk, there can't walk. How irritations and torturous it is man. 

Note to myself. Never walk that long path again. NEVEREVEREVER.

Verdict

So I was not affected by it. Some of my friends do though. 

The verdict is passed. I can be promoted to next semester!!! Woohoooooooooo

Huh what did i do?




Dear National Tertiary Education Union(NTEU),
I don't understand why is there a need to withholding results of students studying in RMIT. Why are we innocent students dragged down by this? You have a problem, you deal with the school, not deal with us. We are such innocent batch of students trying to study in the university and just  want to get a degree asap.

How could you even think of this as a solution to your problem. This is obviously unfair and unethical. Where is your ethics? Is that how you make people accept your demands? As a union, is this the only way you could solve your problem? Is this the best you can come out with? We, students are not even affiliated  with you anyway, so tell me why? How could you target us? We are nothing but bargaining chips to you? 

Shame on you, NTEU.

Sincerely,
Pissed off RMIT student

Holding out

Today is 29th May 2013. I went to temple with my mum. It has been so long. I can't even remember the last time I went out with her.

As we are crossing the road, i held her hands to cross safely and I realised it has been ages since I held her hands. I told her about this and we both laughed. I knew at that point she was also remembering about the old times. This time round, it was me who turned to hold her hands. It felt surreal.

I remembered the time when she will always hold my hands when we went out, afraid that I will get lost or what. I also remembered the time when she bought chicken rice for me when I came back from my kindergarden class, switching on cartoons for me at the same time. 

She has aged and I grew older. Things changed and I have no common topics with her to talk when I was in the train with her. But still, I tried my best.

At one point of the journey, I was suggesting her to go eat ah chew desserts after temple and she keep refused, saying it was expensive. I do not know whether she know i am treating her anot, but in my mind, i wanted to treat her. After many attempts of asking her to try, she finally agreed with the idea. I loved how she reacts and in the end changed her mind. So there we went. From her face, i could tell that she was happy choosing the dessert and this makes me happy too. Later i even bought Ritz applepie for her to try.

Sometimes in our busy life, we tend to forget those who brings us up. Time to show some love. 

Deal with it

Finally I got a temp job after two weeks of infutile attempts of getting agencies to call me despite me sending one resume after another. I truly enjoyed my two weeks of freedom of going out with Eugene, meeting colleagues for lunch, rotting at home surfing websites and watching shows. But as time passed and no signs of getting a job, there were feelings of unrest of rotting at home for the whole month until school starts. There will be so sadddd.

So anyway, I came in as a newcomer again. There goes again, the feelings of unwelcomeness. It is the same as what I had on previous jobs. No one cares, no one bothers of course. If I'm an old bird there, I will also choose to ignore the newcomer. This is human nature and I know it very well. And you can't wait to blend in to the surroundings. 

With some years of experience, I learnt that you have to wear differernt masks to work whether you like it anot. If you are not happy, don't show, pretend to listen and then vent somewhere else lol. It is always best to maintain good working relationship with your colleagues and superiors, need them later!

Deal with it is my motto whenever I feel outcasted. I don't care a shit how people look at me or what. I will always tell myself i am coming here to work, gain some exp and leave once the time is up. Life is too short to be bothered with these stuffs. So why be bothered? Nah.

So anyway,met with the HR manager and her assistant. They are so friendly that I feel like working with them in future! Lol. It's one of those rare occasions that your superiors are good friendly souls, encourage you to eat snacks at pantry and even say offer to lunch with you knowing you are alone. How nice, i love this warm and cosy feeling;)

Elites VS common people VS very common people.

Elites VS common people VS very common people.

Obviously, there is a big gap between these two groups of people, elites VS very common people. And of course , the levels of thinking and IQ of those people.

The rich favors the PAP policies while the poor supports the opposition parties. Like a coin, there is always both sides of scenerios. There can never be fairness and the cycle goes round again. 

I happened to read something about PAP. They consisted of an elite team, having doctorates among them. How easy to become a doctor?? Not easy at all. The thesis itself is more than 300 pages.  How could they be compared to opposition parties in terms of education wise? Nah. Would you really be comfortable if they are appointed as ruling party? We need someone capable, someone who is able to think far and show results for the country. Of course, I believe there is a need for balance between these two parties. No pressure, no motivation.

On the other hand, I look down upon keyboard warriors who are arrogant and only knows how to diss  people. If what you said make sense, I will agree with you. If what you said dont make sense, I'll take it as a pinch of salt of us having different views. Why is there a need to bring out the vulgarities. Saying things that are irrelevant to the topic? This only shows how shallow you are. And those people are usually the one that cries wolf first.

Treasure

It's one of these times where you treasured the time you spent with your parents.

Today I went out for dinner with my dad and mum. Simple dinner of curry fish head and some chicken wings at Bedok. On the way back, my mum suddenly say that my sis is one of those rare kind that cares about them the most which I can't agree more. My sis would always randomly take them out for dinner, to shopping etc. i look upon my sis as my role model. Sometimes I just wanna do just that, but I have no resources now. i I promise that next time when I work, I will treat them well. 

That's her and the 3 little kids. 

When she was out of job for a period of time, she will randomly come to my house buying porridge for my dad or for me. Not only that, when she knows how to cook some desserts, she will iust come from her house and cook for us, and then go back after that. There was a time where i was having exams in the noon, she bought me tau huay and you cha quey for breakfast and nasi lemak for lunch. Its just that small little things that she do makes people feel.. you know..?

As we are walking back, I suddenly talk about politics with my dad and he sound interested which makes me happy. It is one of the rare occasions that you know ya. He even make orange juice for us when we came back. :) 

You know, 
I wanna jog with my dad one day
I wanna bring my parents out and treat them really nice food one day.
I wanna bring them overseas one day.
I wanna them to know I care them as much as my sis care about them. 

In the the mean time, I shall converse with my dad more and treat my parents well. Because they are the ones that brings me up. I want to treasure them before its too late.

Mothers is the greatest of all.

Sis and her husband cooked a spread for our family during the eve of mothers' day


 Got her a bag and a handphone! :) Look how happy she is. 




i remembered when i was feeling sick during kindergarden/ primary school time, she will put my feet on her face to see whether i have fever anot. i know right. Why would she even do that?  As i grew older, i joke and ask her why she does that cos its dirty you know,and she said not where got dirty, and i laughed. When my stomach is bloated, she will help me rub my tummy not minding the disgusting smell of ointment.
haha that was when i was young lah, now dont have already. lol. 




To my dearest mum,
Sometimes we may have things to quarrel about, but whenever i thought about how you took great pains to deliver me, i will regret quarrelling with you. But oh well, sometimes, anger often eats me up. You know i don't mean it, don't you? Now, i learnt to control, to understand and to let go. Love you always though i don't show! xoxo

We only live once. Why waste time fighting over things, not worth it. Gotta enjoy life before time's is up. 

Rewind

Woohoo! Finally got my data back after trying all sorts of dings and dongs. I am a happy girl now! :) Gonna back up every now and then already. No way is this going to happen to me again!

Crash on me why why why

I am very sad now. My computer died on me today. Now I am using my phone to type this out. Sigh.. Actually last year already got problems already, but I managed to keep it under wraps by hitting it. I know.. but not I want one. It keeps cannot be switched on until I hit it with my palms and it miraculously can be switched on. This goes on for months and now it can't stand my beating anymore and decided to die on me.

Oh computer, how do I live without you in my everyday life? There is no one day i never used you unless i went overseas. Sigh. I am very sad. I can't catch shows now, can't Facebook now, can't 9gag now, can't alot alot alot of things. FML. And the thing is I haven't even back up at all!! Ya should have back up earlier right. I know. But my HD has only 5gb of space! And I didn't know it was going to die on me today!!!!! :( Perhaps I should be grateful of it not dying during the time when I am doing assignments or exams. But still..

I shall go see if anything can revive my com now. If not, I am going to hit it again!! Maybe it will wake up? Getting on my nerves seriously where it keep appearing automatic repairs, diagnosing screen and restarts again. WHAT DO YOU WANT?I just hope that it will let me back up at the very least! Not very demanding what right? Zz sigh I am very sad:(((


孙燕姿-当冬夜渐暖 (Cover)


Rusty rusty me. So long since..
孙燕姿-当冬夜渐暖 (Cover)




Brings back alot of joy when i played this.

Breather

Today is 7th of May 2013.
Finally, all exams are over! Can finally take a well deserved break from today onwards! Will be looking for jobs pretty soon to earn some quick and easy bucks. To say the truth, it is kinda satisfying to receive my own paycheck after one month of work rather than lazing around.It's like getting free money with your own effort and gaining free experience and knowing more about the nature of people and office politics. Enlightening I would say. I love learning new things and acquiring new knowledge.

Today, I tried to enjoy myself today as much as possible since i finished exams but I found its not getting anywhere. Soon I get bored with all the surfing of websites, watching shows and playing game. It's always when you are preparing for exams, you feel the need to enjoy after finished exams. But when the day comes, you realised this doesn't go anywhere actually. It's the unproductive lifestyle again. So to sum up, one doesn't work for money but to see the world.





What happens?

What will happen if you put an flying insect in a helium balloon..Will the insect survive through the plummeting speed when the balloon bursts?


Table manners

I miss the burger, truffle fires and the dessert man.

The place is at changi city point. If there were things to do over there. If. I wouldn't mind going there again and again.












A bad 45 minutes

Today is 28th April 2013.

Three papers down and i'm left with one more to go in the next following week Now feels like there is still something need to be done before i can start enjoying fully. The last day of the examination has to be on the 7th May. More than one week from now.

Of all dates, it MUST be so far apart from each other.

 ??
This is so sickening, neither here nor there. Ya although got alot of time to study, but i don't appreciate this. I would rather they plan it in a way such as giving us a few days break, once and for all finish the whole examination. Please don't give us a long break to study. I will appreciate it more. Sigh, guess they need to care about other students also. Oh well. 

Today, I stoned for a bad 45 minutes, thanks to my phone for having no battery. Just when i needed it for some entertainment, it fails me. I always hated this when this happens to me.
For me, a no-batt phone is a useless phone, really feel like throwing away my phone when this happened. I felt so handicapped without phone. I cursed and regretted why i didn't bring my rechargeable battery when i should. Bad 45 minutes because the journey was long, nothing interesting to look and i have no source of entertainment at ALL.

That's when I thought about how technology changes us. Because of social devices, we are trapped in our own world. Before social devices becomes popular, what is entertainment to us when we are travelling in trains? We stone. We look at people. We look at the moving scenery outside the train window. We look at the floor when nothing else interest us.That's entertainment before. Simple. 

Nowadays, the common sight is people staying glued on the their phones or other media devices. That's entertainment now. This becomes a social norm. Those things are so much interesting, not boring, oh, so fun and entertaining. Ah, Facebook, Instalgram, Twitter, 9gag, Whatapps, video clips games, apps like candy crush. How could i not bring them out?? Though i am not a very social person, I just cannot move away from those social networks. And that is when internet connection is much needed. We don't look at the surroundings unless something catches us attention. It actually becomes weird when you don't follow the social norm. So basically i just stoned, people looking at me was like, hey, where is your source of entertainment??  And i was like ok..whatever.. if only i have a usable phone right now, i will not stone for goodness sake please!


Anyway to sum up, that's what i feel: 
  1. If i have a phone with no battery, my reaction will be damn, why did THIS happened to me on this day..where is my rechargable battery when i needed it..
  2. If i have a phone with with bad internet connection- Tell me what am i paying for, M1??
  3. If i have a phone withwith internet - Nice, i have chosen the best network of all time, LTE yay

Shall start bringing my rechargeable battery around now, lest i forget and regret it again. That bad 45 minutes, i will remember it. 

Pessimistic

I am not an optimistic person.
Sometimes i wish i were.

Happy birthday!

Today is 7th April 2013.
My dear friend birthday!
Happy birthday Miss Chervel! :)
Let go all your worries and enjoy yourself today!
Have fun first, study can wait! :P




May our friendship last! :)

Loving it

Today is 5th April 2013.
Cold showers from now on! Never felt so refreshing in my shower before!

Things change for a reason.
If it's for the better, why not?


Blues

Today is 4th April 2013.
No school today and i'm at home revising my work now.
I always have the habit of dozing off whenever i starts reading my lecture notes, even for a few pages.Not one time, but several times. Sick of this habit.

Mum yesterday cut papaya for bro and me and asked if us if we will cut fruits for her next time when she's old. This random question struck me. Of course i will, mum. I love you.



How people feel about you. This got to stop.
Once you stop thinking about how people feel, there's no issue what.
It's their problem, not yours. 
Heck care and tomorrow is a better day.

It's your life. Why do you care so much? 
Life is simple.


Back

Hello.
Today is 2nd April 2013.
Yes, you are right. It has been ages since i last touched this blog. Is time the issue? Maybe. Is interest the issue? Maybe.

Nowadays have been busy with stuffs, school stuffs oh well. Excuses you may say. 
It was not like before where i had the interest of blogging stuffs. Now what i feel is, ain't nobody got time for that. What changes? i got much better things to do than to blog. 

Actually not really. I just wanna surf websites, watch shows and go to sleep, wake up to a new start and repeat the same process again. It's just .. no feel..?

I stopped playing guitar too.
Somehow i reach to a stage where i don't know how to improve my skills.
I am stuck at this level where i don't know how to proceed.

Today i tried playing 'How I Met Your Mother' intro song. Yah, pretty lame, but i like the song so. Initially it wasn't nice, cos i can't follow what the tutorial teaches. The feeling sucks. And then i try to find for other simpler chords, i managed to find it and i can play it. That feeling was nice. But this is when i learnt that i only know how to play simple chords with the same strumming, the same plucking. What gives? 

I viewed and listened the videos i once uploaded. I miss the old me when i had the passion, learning my own, viewing videos and envying the singers/guitarists. Now its gone. Like i said, I've reached to a stage where i don't know how to improve further. Or maybe i lack the perseverance and determination i don't know. 

Anyway, today i went to run. I thought about things.
Motivation is the one that keeps you going. Once you lose the motivation, your mind stops and that's it. Its really hard to cultivate motivation. 

I was running and perspiring non stop. I reckoned my face was red like tomato
And there is one girl, running together with me. No sweat, no redness and running effortlessly.

At first, one part of my mind told me go, catch up with her, i can do it! When i starts to get breathless, another part of mind told me to forget it, she has a strong stamina, i can't compete with her. And that is when my legs give way and ran slower. I am not motivated enough. Actually, I just want to complete the god damn distance. It always seems so near yet so far. I've to constantly motivate myself to reward myself with Ribena or 100 Plus after the run. 

Ok. I am going to turn in now. Its 126AM and tomorrow i have an afternoon class, so not too bad. 
Unlocked these achievements today:
  • Run
  • Change bedsheet
  • Do EP case study question 8
  • Revise EG
  • Learn to play 'How I Met Your Mother' intro song
  • Eat some fruits
  • Do crunches(Damn, i did wrongly for the past few days!)
  • Pay bills(OH, I haven't pay my bills!)